Sad News
It is with great sadness that I am writing this entry.
Today we are mourning the loss of a wonderful, kind and caring man - our friend Jerry. Jerry will be greatly missed by my entire family. Although I know we never said it enough - We love you, Jerry!
Today we are mourning the loss of a wonderful, kind and caring man - our friend Jerry. Jerry will be greatly missed by my entire family. Although I know we never said it enough - We love you, Jerry!
April 28, 1948 - April 10, 2006
Jerry may have been a big man, but if you knew him you will know he had to be big in order to hold his enormous heart.
Jerry, we love you and miss you!
Please leave your memories, thoughts and prayers in the comments section. Thank you.
UPDATE:
We were told there is going to be a memorial service in Hudsonville, Michigan on Tuesday at 1:30 at the Hudsonville Congregational Church of Christ, 4950 32nd Ave. Hudsonville, MI 49426
posted by Arctic Fox @ 11:16 p.m.
90 people have enlightened us with their thoughts
90 Comments:
I miss him so much already! Jerry was such a kind and wonderful person. Just wish I could have said bye. My prayers are with him!
We are sorry for your loss. We send our thoughts to your Mom and your family.
Jerry, You were so special to all of us, and especially to my Mom. You gave each other so much Happiness.
Your kindness, generosity, and warmth will be missed, but definately not forgotten.
Goodbye Jerry.
Thear Horowitz family!
I'm sorry for your loss. I didnt know Jerry but everythig i heard about him,
i imagine that he was a great person whit big heart! I'm mourning whit you.
Whis you all well! Robert
I was very sad to hear of Jerry's passing. I didn't know him personally but we did exchange emails & pictures as well as having many conversations in Tri-Peaks. He will be missed greatly on the internet. His suffering is now over.
Aloha oe!
I met Jerry about three years ago on-line and over this time we became the best of friends. With modern technology, even though we lived hundreds of miles apart we were able to talk on-line every night. In the three years there was only about 2 or 3 times we didn't speak. The kindness, generosity and thoughtfulness he showed me is beyond words. He was a very kind and gentle person. He grew to love my kids as much as they loved him. He always told me that he "adopted" my kids. We went on several vacations together and when he was here we loved going for drives or just to Timmy's for a coffee. We didn't have to do exotic things to be happy...just being together and talking was good enough.
I was very fortunate to have been in Arkansas to visit him just 2 1/2 weeks ago. We spent a wonderful 2 weeks together, just going to the movies, driving around and feeding "his duckies".
He was looking forward so much to travel to Ontario to visit us.
Jerry, you truly were a wonderful person.
It's hard for me to imagine that I won't be able to speak to him every night or to get his 'Hi Hon' every morning.
Jerry suffered very badly with his legs especially over the last 8 months or so and he really did not deserve that.
My greatest comfort is knowing that his legs aren't giving him any more pain.
And Jer....Jaspy, Jippy, Woofie and the dukies say...Bye Dadz...
I only wish you knew Jerry all the nice things people are saying about you....you just never ever realized how much people really cared about you...
Gone.....but will never be forgotten
Love always
Shelly
There is just one more thing that I wanted to add, Jer, you were my moms protector and I know that you will now be watching over her. Jer....I hope you know just how much you meant to myself and my family.
I love you always!
I have known Jerry for 3 or 4 years and played in the pogo games with him. He has always been a very nice and sweet person. I am so sorry to hear that he has passed away. I know he was in pain with his legs. He always had a friendly word for all of us.
I have only been corresponding with Jerry online for about 8 months. He was teaching me canasta. We were going to meet this summer. Oh my, I am in shock and miss him already. He was a such a nice and caring person. My condolences to his family!
OH MY IM STILL IN SHOCK..I JUST LEARNED TODAY OF JERRY'S PASSING....I JUST CANT BELEIVE IT.....JERRY WAS A REAL NICE MAN AND HE WAS EVER SO POLITE AND KIND TO EVERYONE......I MET JERRY IN POGO, TRIPEAK'S, HUMMING BIRD ROOM....I KNOW HE SUFFERED SO MUCH WITH HIS LEG'S.....HE WAS SUCH A GOOD PERSON TO ALL...JERRY WILL BE MISSED VERY MUCH.......HE HAD SO MANY FRIEND'S.....IT'S IS SO SAD TO LOSE A FRIEND LIKE JERRY......MAY GOD BLESS HIS FAMILY.....ILL MISS JERRY VERY MUCH.......LUV YA JERRY.......JANICE AKA( CAREING4UTO)......REST NOW JERRY..
I am so shocked,Ive knew Jerry for about 3 years,I met him on pogo,the old bingo room.and he drew my heart he was a very sad man at that time,but as the days and months went by he got to feeling better. He came to Des Moines and we got to meet in person, it was very nice to put a face to the person on the net.Him and another couble and I went to dinner had a wonderful time. he made it back up one more time. I think he was on his way to Canada to see (his) Shelly. that was the last time , but talked to him on the puter. He was a VERY caring man.He was like a brother to me. I will miss him sooooo much. Be in peace jerry. lilfluffy
from THEDFORD ONTARIO CANADA
I like so many others met Jerry thru POGO tri-peaks etc.He was a great person and i see he was born on april 28th /48 my son we are having the memorial for on sat was born april 28th/58 so i shed a few tears for the 2 of them .I was hoping to meet Jerry when he came up to his DAD'S in ohio or on his way to TO to see SHELLY .
Without friends we all would be in a sorry state and he had also just travelled to Branson MO. to visit with KBANE1 and her hubby
GOODBYE JERRY MY FRIEND AND MAY YOU NOW REST PAIN FREE WE'LL ALL MISS YOU
It was a real shock to hear of Jerry's passing. I had known Jerry for thirty years and we had kept in contact on and off during the years. His children and mine went to the same nursery school together.
We kept in contact even after he moved out of state. The last email I received from him was last Saturday, pictures of the storm they had close by where he lived.
My heart goes out to his family. He will be missed.
My deepest condolences to Shelly and her family. As well as to Jerry's sons, brothers and father. Jerry loved you all very much and I know you are feeling his loss deeply.
He loved each and every one of the online friends that he had. You all made such a difference in his life. You were his family. I know he even had family names for many of you. I wish you had all gotten to know him as I did.
I have known Jerry for nearly 10 years now. We also met online, but were fortunate enough to build a relationship in person as well. He was one of the best friends I have ever had in my life. I loved him a great deal. My entire family is feeling his loss. He got to know not only me and my kids, but my brothers, sisters, parents, neices, and nephews. And we are all saddened by his death.
Anyone who knew Jerry, knew what a loveable, huggable, sweet, kind and giving man he was. I have never met another person with a heart so big. He helped me through some rough times and I had the chance to do the same with him. We leaned on each other many times. I was very lucky to have him in my life. I missed him when he moved away from MI, but we kept in touch online and even managed to have a few more visits.
I am feeling such an overwhelming loss knowing he is gone from my life. My kids and I have so many memories to make us smile. Those will have to be our comfort in this difficult time.
JERRY - YOU MEANT THE WORLD TO ME. I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART. OUR TIME TOGETHER WAS TOO SHORT, BUT I FEEL AS THOUGH YOU WILL ALWAYS BE A PART OF ME. THANK YOU FOR SHARING YOUR GOODNESS WITH ME, ERIC, JANEL AND THE REST OF THE FAMILY. YOU WILL BE MISSED MORE THAN I CAN EVEN SAY.
rest stops...balconies....OM
Thank you.
REST IN PEACE.
oh, my, what a shock. JV, I will miss you in Hummingbirds...It will never be the same without you...Your pain is gone, my friend.
JV, I will miss you very much. Thanks for the many hours on line and the wonderful emails. I send my condolence to his 3 sons, Shelly, and to all of us who knew JV. He was always there for all of us and always had beautiful advise for each of us. JV, I will really miss you and so glad you don't have to suffer anymore. JV I still remember the night before Christmas when we were talking about your eldest son calling you and wishing you a Merry Christmas and telling your Dad that you Loved him. You will never know how much that meant to JV as he was crying has he wrote the words. JV, rest in peace and know that we each will miss you so much.
With love,
Agnes
Just found out about Jerry's passing...I am truly sorry for his sons and his dear friend, Shelly. Jerry was always a gentleman and a gentle man who loved life and travel and whose "antique" hunting became almost a game for him. He never did find me a mini-Tobey jug. We met in a TriPeaks game room and that room will not be the same with him. We'll all miss him.
Attention: Jerry's Family
It has been 5 days now and we would appreciate if any one of you could please contact someone in Shelly's family. He was a big part of our lives and he passing has affected us in a way none of us ever expected. Please make initial contact through this comment section or at wild_life_tech@yahoo.com
Thank you
Thank you so much for all your comments. I was told there is going to be a memorial service in Hudsonville, Michigan on Tuesday at 1:30 at the Hudsonville Congregational Church, 4950 32nd Ave.
This week the sons have been in Ark. busy taking care of everything.
They said it has been very hard on them.
It was good to know that so many people appreciated Jerry.
I JUST FOUND OUT TODAY ABOUT JV'S PASSING AND I AM SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT IT. JV MAY YOU REST IN PEACE AND GOD BLESS JV'S FAMILY
I am terribly sry to here about Jerry's passing we chatted quite often , when ever he seen me come into the room he always said hi and gl .. He will be greatly missed
Our prayers are with him and his family. God Bless!
God Bless Jerry'sfamily. May your grieving period be short as you know he is in God's great kingdom.
He will be missed by all.
Bea
Note: Jerry's obit is published in The Grand Rapids Press today. (4-17-06)
You may read it by going to:
-Google and typing in Grand Rapids Press
-click on the mlive.com link
-scroll down to the obituaries and click on his name
-if you wish to sign the guest book click on the guest book link
Jerry's Memorial Service is going on in Michigan as I am typing this message - April 18th, 2006
I am hoping my sister will be able to read the following at his service:
We’re sorry we couldn’t make the trip to be here with you today, but we are here with you in our thoughts and in our hearts.
Jerry came into our lives about 3 years ago. We met Jerry when he came to Thornhill, Ontario to visit with my mother, Shelly. Jerry was very special to us. We have very fond memories of Jerry - making his “barbeque” for us, cutting up half a dozen cantaloupes, making bird houses, going to Lonestar for a birthday celebration, and having barbeques and plenty of conversations in the backyard at mom’s house. We will miss the trips to Tim Hortons and our long internet conversations. We will never be able to see or hear of an auction without thinking of him. Two very special memories include Jerry visiting us in Lindsay, Ontario - spending hours sitting by the river, fishing and feeding the ducks. The other is Jerry at our wedding this past summer. Jerry did his best to get his legs in good enough shape to make the trip. We were so glad to have him there as part of our special day.
Jerry may have been a big man, but if you knew him you will know he had to be big in order to hold his enormous heart. We don’t know if Jerry ever knew the impact he had on our lives. He was a very special friend to us. We were looking forward to spending time with him this summer - going home won’t be the same without him there.
Jerry, we will miss you more than you will ever know. You will always be in our thoughts and hold a special place in our hearts. We love you!
Love Tom and Robyn
Inuvik, Northwest Territories, Canada.
My dearest Jerry:
We laughed together
We cried together
And we comforted one another
There is so much we did and saw
But there was so much more we wanted to do and see
You loved my children and they loved you
You were a big part in all our
lives, more than you ever knew
Jer, you are suffering no more
You were too good a man to have any suffering
You are always in my thoughts
And will be forever in my heart
Love you my sweet Jer
Always,
Shelly
I just can't believe Jerry is gone. I expect to see him on-line when I sign in to Messenger. I can't believe we will never hear from him or see him again. Everyday I shed a tear for my friend.
I miss you, Jerry!
I can't believe it either...There hasn't been a day that I haven't thought of him. He was always there for me. I could always count on him for anything. Gosh, I miss him so very, very much.
Today, Friday April 28th should have been a day of celebrating, of lighting candles on a cake to celebrate the 58th birthday of Jerry, but instead it will be a day of reflecting back and reliving the memories I have of this wonderful, caring and loving man. We will light a candle to honour him as more tears are shed.
Jer, although you are not here to celebrate this day, you are here in my heart. A minute doesn't go by without you in my thoughts.
Love ya sweets..
Shelly
Happy Birthday Jerry!!
Jerry, I know You are gone from here, but Somewhere I just know You are celebrating Your Birthday and I want You to know that I am thinking about You and sending wonderful thoughts and lots of Love Your way.
I Miss You Lots,
Happy Birthday,
Howie
Today I should have been lighting the candles and singing Happy Birthday to Jerry as he would have been in Toronto celebraing his B-day. Instead in the Horowitz home we lit a candle in honor of Jerry on what would have been his 58th B-day!
So young!! Jerry,,,,Happy Birthday!
Its been almost 3 weeks and I also still can't believe that Jer is gone. I miss him on my msn and there is not a day that goes by that my mom and I don't talk about Jer.
Jerry you are my true angel now!
I love you very much!
I miss you!!!!!
I too am very sorry to hear of Jerry's passing.I knew him from
Tri-Peaks Solitaire on Pogo Games
in the Hummingbird Room. I loved
when I saw JVenema come on and even
though he was suffering with his
legs the entire time I knew him....
he was still a real gentleman with
nothing but kind and uplifting words for his fellow roomies. He is
in no pain now and he is surely walking ( running ) on those streets of gold having a grand reunion with loved ones who passed on before him. Although he is greatly missed here....he is remembered with great love. Patty PatCinTexas
Shelly, I didn't get to meet you at Jerry's memorial service. I just wanted you to know that you are in my prayers, as are his sons and grandsons. Jerry was always the kindest and sweetest, the only thing that gets me through is knowing he's in a better place. Just know that my prayers are with you and your family.
It seems like forever since I last spoke to Jer and yet it's only been a few weeks. Long, long weeks.
I just wish I could come home and talk to him. We spoke for hours on end. When we first starting talking there were a few times we started in the evening and were still talking when the sun came up the next morning. We always had something to say, whether it was a joke or something serious, whether it was just about something or nothing...we talked...We argued at times but never stayed angry with one another. I feel so empty and so lost knowing that these conversations will never happen again, although I do speak to him in my thoughts. Jer was such a special special person. Things were not ever easy for him. He deserved so much more. He deserved to be loved more by those he loved so very much.
Jer never had an unkind word to say about anyone. Although he had friends who cared deeply, he was still very lonely. He wanted nothing more than for me to retire and move down to Arkansas and spend the winters down there. He always worried about everyone. I worried a great deal about him too.
I sure miss our conversations and our little drives when he was in town.
I sit and think about Jer constantly. I will always think about this great man.
He was loved so much by myself and my kids and he loved us very much as well.
Jer lived his life always thinking of others and putting others before himself. He was just so great.
Love
Shelly
One month has gone by. One very very long month. A month without hearing "Hi Hon", "Nite Sweetheart" "Oh, you're home, that's good, I worry until you get home".....Jer worried about everyone, it's too bad that he didn't worry more about himself...only if had....
I can't begin to say how much I miss him. I miss our talks. I miss our playing Canasta and Gin. I miss his visits here and I even miss the little arguments.
I still shed tears when I think of this great person...I don't think there's another person who always put others before themselves like Jer did.
A month...one long long month...but for Jer it's been a month of no pain and that is the only thing that keeps me going...although a month of no pain and him still being here would have been the greatest gift. But unfortunately that will never be.
Now I live with the memories he gave me. They will be forever with me.
Jer: I miss you so very much.
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
Yesterday was not a good day for me because I was sitting and thinking and what came to mind is that Never is Forever
Never will I hear his voice
Never will we go on those drives
Never will we sit and chat
Never will we play cards
Never will we go to a casino
Never will Jer play games in pogo
Never will he build another birdhouse
Never will he hear the birds sing or the flowers grow
Jer loved going for drives..he loved showing me things he discovered on those drives...
Yes, never is forever...
and forever will my heart ache for I have lost a true gentleman...a man who deserved so much more out of life...
Love always
Shelly
Days come and days go but no day goes by without my thinking of Jer.
I always reflect back to the things we did and the things we were going to do.
I think back to my visit to Arkansas in March and how excited Jer was to take me to some restaurants he had been to and how happy he was that we went to so many auctions together...He just wanted to show me so much. I remember the great steaks we made for dinner and then sat and watched a movie..it was the first time he had rented a movie and we went to the movie theatre twice...they had just opened up in Arkansas and Jer was so excited I was there to go with him. His greatest joy was showing me one night how the ducks appeared out of nowhere when he "quacked" and they heard his voice...and before long the van was surrounded with ducks for him to feed...memories...memories..that's all I have now....but these memories will be forever with me.
Jer, you were truly a great person....I miss you so much...
Love ya sweetie
Shelly
Another day...another day has passed and I don't have Jer to talk to....I don't know how I will ever come to grips with that...it's just so hard to accept.
My companion, my best friend....I miss you so very much....
Words simply can't express the empty feeling I have....
My kids have been so good...they try so hard to make that feeling go away,,,but it won't....
Jer...you were always there for me....and now that you're not..it's hard...very very very hard.
I miss you my sweets
Love ya
Shelly
I don't know if anyone is coming in here to read about Jer, but it doesn't matter..it makes me feel better...and when I think of something I just have to write.
Last night I thought of this and wanted to share it with whoever may be reading this.
The first Christmas Jerry was at my place, the place where I work was participating in a Toy Drive for underprivileged children...I asked Jer if he could take me to a store so I could pick up a few things to take into the office, which he did of course without any hesitation. I bought a few toys and took them to work...
The next day when I got home from work Jer was all excited to show me the contents of two big bags. When I looked inside it was packed with little cars, dolls, puzzles, games, etc. etc. I asked him why he had all that and he said, it's for you to take to the office..there's no place down in Arkansas for me to do this and it's a great idea...
The following Christmas he asked me about the Toy Drive and I told him that the company was doing something else this year. But did that stop him? No, it didn't. A few days later he showed me another two big bags filled with toys....more cars, dolls, puzzles, stuffed animals, etc. etc. He told me that he heard the fire departments were collecting toys to take to children who didn't have anything and he wanted to help out.
So this was the kind of man Jer was...always thinking of those less fortunate and always wanting to help out in whatever way he could. That's what made him happy.
Last Halloween he wasn't able to make it down here to Canada but he told me that he had bought bags of candy....when I told him that I doubt he would have many kids show up..he said, maybe not, but I have to have some just in case..and then he said he had a bunch of candy to take down to the office just in case the kids showed up there.
These are just a few acts of caring that came to mind...There are countless others, but I wanted to share these at this particular time.
I constantly ask myself...why did such a wonderful man have to suffer so much, have so much pain?
Jer deserved so much more out of life...he deserved good health and lots of happiness....and above all no pain and now he has no more pain.
Jer..I miss you...
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
Today I ran into a friend who attended high school with Jerry and asked what happened. She had read his obit in the Press and said she was shocked to hear of his passing. She would run into him from time to time and will always remember him as the good guy from school. She reminded me of his job in high school at the local roller rink, I had forgotten that. He had played football in high school but was not a "jock" just a nice guy who was kind to everyone.
Shelly I have read your postings and I wish there was something I could say to ease your pain. Jerry spoke highly of you and was proud of your relationship. He always looked forward to your visits and his trips to Canada. Hold on to all the magic moments you had together and let them comfort you.
Jerry was a man of great faith and he lived his faith. We talked many times about the afterlife and he was not afraid to leave this world. I do not think he was ready to leave quite so soon however.
I want to thank the last person who wrote in here...if you ever come back in please write your name at the bottom of the message or where it says 'choose an identity' click on other and put your name in the username and then go down and print the letters...(you do not have to put anything in password) after you type the letters just hit the login and publish button and it will enter it with your name on top...it would be great to see who writes in here...it makes me feel great to know that so many people were so fond of Jer and so they should be...he was the most wonderful person I have known...he cared about everyone more than he did of himself....he was happy when he could do something to make others happy...
I can't stop thinking of him...and I never will...
Shelly
Another day has passed...
Another day has come and gone...
Every day I sit and think of Jer...
I still just can't believe that when I get home from work that he won't be calling to make sure that I got home safely nor will he be on the computer, or on his way to an auction.....something he loved doing....
Sometimes I think it's only a dream and I'll wake up from it..but it's not a dream, it's a nightmare...
I planted some flowers the other day and immediately thought of Jer because he loved helping in the garden when he was here...
No matter what I do, he's in my thoughts...always in my thoughts, forever in my heart.
Love ya sweety
Shelly
It amazes me that whatever I do, whether it's being on the bus, eating dinner, watching TV, standing outside the house, feeding the kitties, it doesn't matter what it is....Jer is always in my mind...
I guess it's true that you never know how much you'll miss someone until they're no longer here...
Sometimes I think back to some of the disagreements we had and now they seem so trivial....but like I've said before...we always talked them out and never stayed angry at one another...
Right now I'm sitting at work but my mind isn't here, it's with Jer...I'm thinking of what he'd be doing now if he were alive...probably sitting at his computer and having a cup of coffee...his computer was his link to the outside world.....and later on he'd be getting ready to take a load of his "best buys" down to the market...and then tonight he'd be going to the market and during the day he'd find some time to feed "his" ducks...and of course there would be "our time" to chat..
I wish things would have been different for him...I wish he never experienced all the pain he had...pain not just in his legs, but pain in his personal life as well...
Jer never had it easy but he did the best he could...he tried his best to please everyone...he really really did...that's what made him feel worthwhile...if he was helping others, he felt good...
He was a very good person...with a great heart...
love ya my sweets
Shelly
Last night I was sitting watching some television and all of a sudden my eyes filled with tears...I was no longer thinking of what was on the television but my mind was filled with thoughts of Jerry...
This is not unusual for me...I cry whenever I think of him...I keep wishing that I would come home and be able to get on my computer and have him there to talk to...I wish the phone would ring and he'd be on the other end...
My daughter said to me the other day...mom, which would you have chosen...(1) meeting him and knowing that you would only have Jer around for a short time or (2)never have had the opportunity to meet him at all...and without hesitation I chose knowing him...at least I have great memories which I can reflect back on.
I received a few pictures the other day via email and one of them kind of upset me, but I won't go into that right now...but one picture put a smile on my face. It was a picture of Jer when he was about 18 or 19 years old...I was about to grab the phone and call him to tell him how great he was in that picture and how terrific he looked..but suddenly reality came back and I realized I couldn't do that, so I just sat and looked at the picture...it made me happy to see it...but again tears rolled down my face...
Love ya my sweet Jer
Shelly
Last night I spent quite a bit of time talking to an old friend of Jer's...someone who he also met on line....
She told me that she met him when he drove down to Iowa to meet him along with a group of other on-line friends....they went out for dinner and had a wonderful time.
Throughout the conversation I had with her she spoke of Jer and what a wonderful person he was...like so many others..they considered him a good friend and said he was like a 'brother' to them....he was always someone they could count on...Jer was a good listener and always found the right things to say.
She told me that he brought a little gift for everyone...as is something Jer always did...and she said she put it up near her computer and last night she told me that she will never remove it from that spot...
Jer meant so much to so many...
And something even more to me.
Love ya sweets
Shelly
I will miss him more than all. He was my brother and I saw him every day. Now I miss him every day. Love ya Jer.
Your Bro. Gary
I can't stop thinking of Jer...every single day...he's on my mind...Why did he have to go so young...I keep asking myself that question...
Maybe because God didn't want him to suffer anymore...
Could that be it? I don't know...
All I know is that I miss him and wish he were here...
You are resting now Jer...you don't have any pain...that's good.
Not good for those you left, those who cared so much but good for you...and I guess that's what's important...that a wonderful person like you isn't suffering...
If there could ever be a good thing about you leaving this world, it's that you are finally pain free....
Love ya Jer
Always..
Shelly
Last night I was talking to a friend and she too had only great things to say. She told me how Jer knew she loved nascar things and he sent her a few nascar items which she also keeps close to her.
She spoke of how she misses her conversations with him and she remembers him saying that he was going to drive down there this summer with me to meet her.
I told her that Jer had so many things he wanted to do...so many things he was looking forward to...
So this was another conversation with someone who thought so highly of this man...just like so many others...
Jer, you always said you were so lonely, and sometimes you told me that people don't care about you...maybe there were some that didn't...but that's the case with every person....but if you only knew what people were saying..you'd surely be smiling...
And maybe you are...hope so....
Love ya my sweet one
Shelly
Today for some reason has been a very sad day...
Perhaps it's because the weather has been nice...the flowers are starting to bloom and today I heard baby birds chirping from a nest that they made in a light fixture outside...and I keep thinking that Jer will never again have the opportunity to see these simple things...it's more the simple things that Jer liked that I wish he could still do...
If he were down in Canada now, he'd probably pick up his fishing rod and head over to Lake Wilcox or wherever else was nearby and sit and do a bit of fishing before I got home...hey...he perhaps would have done it down in Arkansas..but down there he was more into watching and feeding "his" ducks...
They probably miss his nightly visits..and wondering why the man in the silver van isn't there calling them to come and get the bread...
I can picture him sitting in the car...tossing that bread ... and then he'd just sit and watch them when they had enough...it was really peaceful..watching them glide along in the water...or just walking along the edge of the water...
Hey...maybe Jer is feeding ducks somewhere else...well if he is...I'm sure he's got a smile on his face...
feeding ducks...without any pain..sounds good...
Love ya Jer
Shelly
There's something I just can't figure out.....it seems like just yesterday that I was down in Arkansas visiting with Jerry and yet it seems like years that I haven't talked to him....
This may sound very odd but it's true...it just seems so long that I haven't come home and gone to the computer and found him on-line waiting for me to come on...and as quick as lightening there'd be....
"hi hon".....geeze I miss that so much...
Tomorrow will be two months....and I still think of him every single day.
Last night, as I sat crying, again, I told my daughter that I really lost my soul mate....
The world really lost a very wonderful, caring, lovable person, when they lost Jerry. He wouldn't harm a fly...and he would probably have fed it if he thought it were hungry.....that's what he was like.
Jer had so many things he wanted to do....so many dreams....and so little time....
Jer...I miss you so very much.
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
Two months without him
Two months now...
A long time not to hear from him
A long time without him
Seems like eternity since we talked
and laughed and shared a joke
I sit and think of Jer
My friend, my soul mate,
I think of all the good things
And sometimes the not so good
I miss you Jer more than you would ever imagine...
How I wish I could turn back the clock...but I can't...
Tears flow as I write this...they just come...
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
I will always hold dear to my heart all the good times we had....the memories I hold are bring smiles and tears.
Although our time together wasn't as long as it could have been or should have been....at least we did have the time we did...
Love ya my sweets and
miss you so very much
Shelly
The seconds pass into minutes, then to hours, days, weeks and months....
Time goes on....and time is suppose to heal.....but so far it's not...maybe not enough time has passed...and I don't know if there will ever be enough time that passes...
Jerry meant so very much to me..
He was my comfort pillow when I was down and I believe I was his as well.
Yesterday I spent so much time reflecting back into the past and spent so much of the day in tears..
It's not easy...Everyone tells me that Jerry would want me to be happy...that he would be upset if he knew what I'm going through...
Perhaps that is so and like I said...I'm trying...but I can't yet come to grips that I'll never see or speak to him again...
I picture him sitting outside in the backyard...or in the front..and it brings tears to my eyes...
Jer...Gosh I miss you....I just wish you knew how much....maybe you do...You meant a great deal to me...
Love ya sweets
Shelly
Shelly have you ever thought of visiting a grief site online? There are many different ones depending on the cause of death or just general ones. It may help to talk with other people going thru the same situation.
Some other ideas may be keeping a journel or writting letters to Jerry.
Your heart will heal in time, just give it time.
A long time friend of Jerry's
Thank you for your ideas. I don't know who you are because you didn't leave a name but I do write to Jerry, maybe indirectly, whenever I write in here.
This gives me comfort when I write things.
Shelly
I would really like to know who you are...why don't you write back and just leave me your name. Thanks.
It's the first day of summer....
The flowers are growing...
The birds are singing...
The days are long....
It's a beautiful time of the year..
But one thing is missing from this picture...
Jer isn't here..
Love ya sweets
Shelly
Beautiful memories filled my mind last night as I watched a show on TV....Elvis Presley by the Presleys
I remembered going to Graceland with Jerry and the wonderful day we had. Jerry walked around all day enjoying the home, the exhibits, the grounds and the plane.
Only once did he sit down for a bit of a rest.
Jerry knew how much I admired this late great singer and the first time I went to Arkansas we drove to Memphis so he could take me to Graceland.
I will always remember and treasure this trip and the great day we had there. Only wish I had the picture we had taken there..
Love ya Jer and thanks for the
memory of that day
Love ya sweets
Shelly
Hi my Jer:
I just wanted to tell you something personally....I'm hoping you can hear me....
I miss you so very much....
You meant so much to me....and you always will....
It's not easy....how I wish you were still here.
I really didn't get to say good-bye to you.
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
Hi my Jer:
No pain
No Care
No Worries
That's what you have now
For you that's great
Love ya my sweets
Shel
Shattered dreams
A broken heart
Love ya and miss you
my sweets, my friend
Always in my heart
Love ya sweets
Shelly
The longer you're gone, the harder it's getting..
More and more I miss our talks...
There's just so much I'd love to tell you...and show you the next time you would have come here...
I don't think anybody really can understand how much I miss you.
I know it's something I have to come to grips with and maybe in time I will,,,,but I'm not really ready for that yet...and I don't know when I'll be ready...
I will never forget but maybe the pain will get a little easier to handle.
love ya sweets
Shelly
Well, the days keep moving along
Nothing new....nothing exciting
They just keep going
Everything goes on as though nothing ever happened...I guess that's life...it goes on...time doesn't stand still
My life really isn't the same...
You were there for me to talk to and laugh and cry with and now I cry alone...
It's not easy,,,but life is not easy for everyone...
You just have to learn to cope...
As hard as that might be...
It's something we have to do...
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
It's been three months....
To me it seems so much longer...
I still can't believe this...
I want so much to be able to speak to you...for you to come onto msn so we can talk....
Nothing seems important anymore because you're not here to share anything with...
Why, why, why...I ask myself that all the time...
Why couldn't your legs get better?
Why couldn't anything be done?
It's not fair that someone as good and kind and thoughtful as you were had to suffer...
I know there's a reason for everything that happens...For you the reason is that you had suffered enough and the suffering had to end...
You left me with a million memories..that's what I cling to...
I miss you so much
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
Today is three months.
You were someone I could tell anything to...
You listened and offered advice...
You were someone I could trust..
You never took anything for granted...
You were someone I cared deeply about...
You are someone I miss very much...
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
Hi my sweets:
I wish I could come home tonight and get to speak to you.....
It would be so nice to talk to you and tell you everything that's happened and have you listen to me, as I know you would...
I miss that connection. Actually I miss everything about you....even the things that used to bother me..
I miss you so very much.
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
Just wanted to say that the hurt is still there....
No day passes without me thinking of you...
Wish you were still here.
love ya my sweets
Shelly
So much is going on....so many changes....you would have been so happy to have come here and look around and see all of those changes...
I really wish I was able to share them with you.
Oh Jer, why did you have to leave?
I miss you.
Love ya sweets
Shelly
Hi my sweets:
You would have been so happy if you were down in Ontario right now...Robyn is here and Tom is arriving on Saturday and I know how much you missed them and how you were looking forward to this summer when you could finally see them again.
I know that they miss you as well and were also looking forward to seeing you again. Sitting in the backyard isn't going to be the same without you there.
I'm so happy to have Robyn home and having Tom coming...but I'm so sad that you aren't here to share this with me.
Gosh Jer, I miss you so much...You meant so much to me and my children....and we all think of you all the time...and me,,,I think of you every minute...
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
It's been a few days since I've written....but Jerry is still thought of every single day.
He will never be forgotten
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
SPECIAL NOTICE:
THERE'S GOING TO BE A DEDICATION CEREMONY FOR JERRY AT THE NATURE CENTRE IN HUDSONVILLE MICHIGAN ON MONDAY AUGUST 7TH AT 11:30.
The Nature Center is located at the East end of New Holland Street. The street dead ends into the beginning of the Nature Center Trails. The tree has been planted east of the end of New Holland Street. That is where we will be meeting.
IF ANYONE IS INTERESTED AND LIVE CLOSE BY....PLEASE COME
SHELY
Every single person that Jerry was friends with knew the kind of relationship, or actually lack thereof that he had with his sons.
Jerry was very upset and hurt and cried a lot over the lack of relationship he had and how he was treated, therefore knowing this it should come as no surprise that his sons had the dedication service cancelled just a few hours before it was to take place.
This was done obviously with no thought given to the time and effort everyone put into it getting it ready to take place on August 7th nor was there any thought given for the people who were planning on attending and especially no thought given to how their dad would have been so happy to have this taken place.
However, those who truly loved, respected and cared for Jerry were there and enjoyed a lovely service.
We then walked through the Nature Centre and enjoyed it. This is something that Jerry had always dreamed of being able to do one day is to walk through there again.
Later on in the day we spent a long time at the cemetary. I know in my heart that Jerry knew we were there and was happy.
This man deserved so much and it saddens me greatly that a dedication in his memory couldn't haven taken place as it was originally planned.
Jer...we love you and were there for you and to me that's all that matters.
Love you my sweets
Shel
My dearest Jer...
It's now been four months that I haven't talked to you on msn or on the phone. I miss this time I had with you. It was our connection when we weren't together.
It doesn't seem to be getting any easier. You meant the world to me.
You would have been so happy being here right now and spending time with Robyn and Tom. I know you loved the two of them so very much and they felt the same about you.
But my love, we came to you since you couldn't come to us.
Jer, I'm sure you know that my kids loved you and respected you. You were their second dad. I know you felt the same way about all of them.
I have cried so many many tears for you. I miss you more than you could ever ever imagine.
You were my strength and my very special friend. I could count on you for anything. It's really really hard for me.
I think of you constantly.
Rest my love...
Love always
Shel
Why couldn't things have been different...
Why did you have to suffer and why couldn't your legs get better..
Why did it have to end this way...
There was so much more to do and to see and to share..
There's no easy answers...it was just meant to be this way I guess.
The pain in my heart is just so heavy...
I miss you....
Love you my sweets
Shelly
Just thinking of you again, as always...
Wish you were here to celebrate Tom's birthday tonight.
Rest my love...
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
Hi my sweets:
So my Robyn and Tom left today for another year...
It's going to be a long year without them here and without you here and without you to talk to. At least Robyn and Tom will be on msn for me...but not you.
Jer, it's so hard not having you with me or me be able to talk to you. It's really really hard to cope with. Each day passes by like the day before...
I know you're not in pain any longer and that's good. But still it doesn't take away the pain for me. Maybe that's very selfish of me. I don't mean it to be.
My sweet sweet Jer.
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
Hi my sweet Jer:
Just wanted to say I miss you and wish you were here.
Sometimes I just have to come in here and write something like this.
I feel this is my link to you. This is where I can come and write to you and be with you.
I cry almost every single time I come in here because this is not the way I should be communicating with you. But it's the best way that I can keep in touch with you.
Man oh man, I miss you.
Rest my sweet Jer.
Love ya my sweets
Shel
Hi my love
My sweet Jer
Tonight I came in here and read every single entry...
And when I was done I just sat there staring at the computer as the tears flowed freely from my eyes.
Tears flow each time I think you will never be with me again.
You truly were my protector...my love, my companion...when I lost you, I lost an amazing person.
Nobody has ever treated me like you did, nor will anyone ever again. You were my world and now that world has been shattered.
I want you here with me so badly that every part of me aches.
I love you so much and miss you more than words could ever express.
Rest now my love
Love ya my sweets
Shel
Why aren't you at the market
Why aren't you at an auction
Why aren't you here
Why aren't you anywhere except where you are, in a place where if someone didn't know wouldn't find you because there's no name saying you are there.
My sweet Jer, you deserved so much more.
Weekends are the worst...because you're not here to share them with me ----
Love you my sweets
Shelly
My dearest Jer:
Lately there's just been so much happening that I would have liked to have been able to share with you.
But this is something I just had to write...maybe you're able to see it...I don't know...
Howie bought a condo today and I'm sure you would have been so excited to hear this. I know you would have been so I needed to share it with you. You would have been as proud of him as I am.
I'm going to miss him being here, as you also knew I would be. But he's not that far and I made him promise he'd stop in to visit me twice a week...for sure....more if he wants to....
Gosh Jer, I always have so much I want to say to you. I certainly hope you can hear me.
Love you sweetie
Rest me sweets
Shel
Just wanted to say Hi Jer....
Before Jer came to visit me for the first time I spoke to someone else who was moving down to Arkansas and into the same apartment complex as Jer was living in. I asked this person to call me when they arrived there to tell me what Jer was like...and they did...
When they got there she called me and said Jer was just a CUDDLY TEDDY BEAR...
And so he was...Just my cuddly teddy bear...only he was a real teddy bear with a golden heart.
I don't think there was a more caring person than he was. He cared about things and people...maybe too much so. But that was Jer.
Jer confided in me so much and I in him. He told me his feelings and what he wanted and what he missed.
Jer never wanted a lot out of life...just to be cared about and to feel wanted...That's all he needed.
Love you Jer..and miss you
Rest my sweet man
Shel
My dearest Jer:
I kept thinking of you all day today. It didn't matter what I was doing, you were in my thoughts.
I could see you sitting at your computer chatting away with friends while you played your favorite games.
I pictured you throwing slices of bread at the ducks.
My thoughts of you when I was down in Arkansas are in my mind and as vivid as if I were still there with you.
I can see you sitting in the van driving to an auction. And I remember us coming out of there and the rain was coming down so heavily and I had asked you to wait until the rain stopped before we drove back to the apartment.
I can picture us waiting in the drive-thru at McDonalds to pick up a coffee and then we headed over the water and chatted while we drank it...We even managed to laugh about silly things. We were happy because we were together but I knew you weren't well. I could see the looks on your face and I knew you were in pain, but you assured me everything was okay.
Jer, I miss you so very much.
Love you sweetie
You are free of pain...
Rest my dear Jer...
Love ya
Shelly
My dear Jer:
When we went to Memphis to go to Graceland, before we went in, we had our picture taken...
At the end of the night we went to see the pictures and you insisted that we get them...
You took home the picture with you.
It's the only picture I had of the two of us together and I would have loved to have that picture now..
Who knows where it is...no doubt shred into a thousand pieces and in the garbage.
It's too bad that whoever last saw it couldn't have been kind enough to send it on to me because I know it's something you would have liked for me to keep and to hold close...It was of no use to anyone except me...
Another disappointment I guess....
and I've certainly had my share of disappointments this year...
disappointments and sadness...not a good year...
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
My dearest Jer
I just don't know how to go on without hearing from you.
The thought of never speaking to you again is just hard to take.
You were one person that I could talk to about anything....you would always listen to me...maybe not always agree or like what I said, but you heard me out.
You came into my life...and I'm so happy for that...I only wish it would have been for so much longer..
Our time together was too short.
I miss you so much...words can't describe how much I miss you.
Love ya my sweets
Shelly
Well today i seen a picture of jerry for the first time. I've talked to jerry a lot of time and miss my nightly talks when i could not sleep and jerry couldn't sleep, so we kept each other company.
We had a lot in common with leg problems and could relate with the pain and hurt that we were going through.
my friend and nightly compainion for talk is gone on to a better place and i'm still here.
i miss you jerry and glad that your in a better place and are no longer suffering.
god does things for a reason and i guess that his reason was for you to have touched my life and to be part of me forever.
thank you for being there when i needed to talk and for me being there when you needed and buddy to talk to.
i miss our late night talks and know that somewhere your sprit is with all of us including shelly. the old stories say the the sprit will guide the souls of others with time. then you have a full time job guiding shelly.
may your sprit continue to be free, go in peace and good journey.
I just read the comments from Dan (Chaserbear)...and I must truly say that his words are very comforting and a very beautiful tribute to Jerry.
Jerry did indeed touch many of us with his kindness.
Jerry touched the lives of so many and tried to bring comfort to others while he himself was suffering so much.
Love you my sweet Jer
Shelly
Shelly, maybe someday you can get rid of your pain and anger. I'm praying for you.
To whoever wrote in here..thanks for writing and thanks for caring...and if you ever come back in here...write your name so I know who I'm talking to...
Now I'd like to reply....
The pain will ease with time....as far as anger....I only have anger for those who didn't treat Jerry with the respect he deserved. But honestly it's something they have to live with..not me...
It's not so much anger as disappointment and I guess there is anger as well...
Jer was a wonderful human being and he deserved to be treated with respect and he wasn't from some of those whom he loved dearly...and it's upsetting...
I hope you understand what I mean...
Shelly
Miss you Jer...
What else can I say...other than you're still missed so very very much and thought of every single day.
Love you my sweets
Shelly
Shelly, you continue to make comments on the lack of respect given to Jerry of which he "didn't deserve", and though you never name any names, people know you are talking about his sons. Although I can only imagine the story Jerry told you about his relationship with his sons, I'm betting that it wasn't the complete story. I'm not going to go into details on what truly took place and what role Jerry had in severing the relationship between his sons and himself (and trust me, it was a BIG role) because it isn't any of your business. The people who need to know, including Jerry, know the true story. Your hammering on the boys about their lack of respect for "such a wonderful and deserving man" is certainly not going to make them change their minds. People do not deserve respect, they earn it. And when they destroy the respect they do have, they will have a very difficult time getting it back, providing they ever do get it back.
You have bad-mouthed the sons on this blog, and you took it a step too far when you called up Jerry's brothers and bad-mouthed the sons. This action was the straw which caused the cancellation of your ceremony in Hudsonville. What exactly were you trying to prove? Whatever it was, it obviously backfired, because your ceremony was cancelled. Meanwhile, the City of Hudsonville held a dedication a few weeks ago which was well-attended by family and friends.
You have also hammered the boys on their unwillingness to purchase a headstone for Jerry. If you feel one is so important, what is stopping you from purchasing one? You feel he deserves one and he is being slighted by not having one. I think the boys have done enough for a man in which their respect for him was beaten out of them (literally and figuratively) by paying for his funeral and taking care of the $50,000 mess he left. They paid for the funeral out of pocket, they are the ones getting the collection calls, and they are the ones who need to deal with all of his tax and finance stuff. I think that's pretty good for three people who, according to you, could have cared less about Jerry. So again...what is stopping you from purchasing a headstone? Or do you just want to make the boys look bad and make yourself look like the poor, unconsolable girlfriend whose hands are too tied to do anything?
Either put your money where your mouth is if you truly believe this will bring the respect "Jerry so truly deserves", or drop the topic.
So, to recap..
1. You don't know the entire history between Jerry and his sons.
2. You don't need to know the enitre history. You just need to realize that Jerry played a HUGE part in the severed ties.
3. People don't deserve respect, they earn it.
4. Stop the bad-mouthing of the sons because you don't know what you're talking about, you don't know all of the story, you're huting yourself, and you're looking like a fool.
Hold on to what you need to in order to get through this grief period. Just don't delude yourself into thinking Jerry was a saint who deserved so much more, because, honestly, I think we are ALL lucky we don't get whet we truly deserve.
Well you certainly said a mouthful and that's fine...that's your opinion...and you're entitled to it..
As far as the cancellation of the service....let me tell you I never bad mouthed anyone...I spoke the truth...and cancelling it a half hour before or an hour before was a horrible thing to do.
And Jerry never ever spoke ill mouthed of his sons. Never...He was proud of them. He was proud of their accomplishments. He was however extremely upset that he didn't have a good relationship. I know he tried and I also know how many tears he shed over it.
And yes, Jerry was a very kind man who deserved to live a pain free life.
I write in here to Jer..I write what I feel. I'm not trying to hurt anyone..and Jerry spoke very very freely to everyone about the relationship he had with his sons.
Jerry never lied..He spoke what was on his mind.
I don't wish his son's any harm. I may not agree with how they treated their father...but that's their business.
But remember this...I was the one that listened to Jer's voice and I knew how much it hurt them and I believe that no matter what...you only get one set of parents and they can never be replaced...they raise you, they tend to your needs when you're growing up and by gosh...they deserve respect...now that's my opinion.
I would like to thank everyone for their kind words, however I feel it is now time to put an end to the comments to this entry. This entry was to be a place to remember and honour the man we knew, not to cause hurt and pain.
I understand that there are two sides to every story. Let us all do our best to remember the good.
Just to let you know, the memorial service was initiated by myself because my husband and I could not make it to the funeral in April. My husband and I live above the Arctic Circle in the Northwest Territories and had a very short window to come pay our respect to Jerry this past summer. It was a long and tiring trip for us, but we did have our own ceremony and a few people did show up despite your efforts to cancel the ceremony soley to hurt my mother.
It was a nice visit and a beautiful service.
I apologize for any pain this Blog has caused, it was meant to be a place for people to remember the good times.
Good night
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